Rainy Season

I just made my way home in the rain from Taman Sari, a collection of outdoor food vendors across the street from my apartment.  

I was just meeting up with one of my life group members ,who lives in Karawaci, for dinner.  When I met her, I started griping about the things I am annoyed about these days - including one of my colleagues.  I would identify her as a mooch.  Any time she knows that I have something in my desk that she craves, she asks me for it but it’s more of informing me that it’s my responsibility to give it to her since I have it.  In so many words.  It’s really annoying.  I don’t think she realizes that she’s like this.  

I made a comment later on during dinner that during Lent I hope that God can help me to understand his grace more deeply.  After that, it started raining.  Once we finished eating, I looked at the clock, thinking it would only be another ten minutes till the rains let up.

But it hasn’t stopped since it started about two hours ago.  

I decided I’d make my way home, like a crazy lady in the rain, because of my trusty rain jacket that I bought back in Ann Arbor nearly four years ago.  And then I realized that I took my raincoat out of my backpack to use it on Saturday.  As my friend and I were leaving the restaurant, one of the waiters picked up a large rainbow umbrella and asked me if I would like to be dropped off at my place.  Even though my apartment really is just a hop, skip, and a jump away from Taman Sari, I took him up on the offer.  

I was glad that I did.  The puddles that accumulated to that point were high enough to reach my ankles and with each step, splashed up onto my pants.  There are children who actually come out with their large golf umbrellas to the malls and public spaces when it rains and they let people rent their umbrellas and walk behind the people in the rain until they have reached their destination, where the renter pays Rp 2000-3000, depending on the distance (less than $0.30 USD)

I stopped at the gate to my apartment, hoping to compensate this young man for his kindness but when I offered what little I had, he said, “Nggak usaha” (no need) and offered to walk me all the way inside.  I told him I’d just run.  I felt bad that he too was wet and would have to spend the rest of his shift not only wet but cold, because it’s cold when its evening and when it rains here.   

I did run to my building, and got even more soaked than I already was.  I realized as I was splashing through the puddles that I became the mooch this evening, too.  That man didn’t have to offer me the temporary shelter of an umbrella, but he did anyway.  And he didn’t ask anything of me.  

It’s funny, I have been learning about hospitality here in Southeast Asia and trying to learn how to do it through my ministry team here at church.  But it’s like, I see that in coming here to try to do something, I am actually on the receiving end a lot more than I expect to be.  “You fed me when I was hungry, you gave me a drink when I was thirsty, you visited me when I was in prison, you clothed me when I was naked.”  “Lord, when did we ever do those things to you?” “When you do it to the least of these, you have done it to me.”  I didn’t imagine that I could also be the “least of these,” on the receiving end.  

You can’t give what you don’t have.  If you don’t understand grace (and by you, I mean me), you can’t show it to others.  If you don’t know need, you can’t have compassion for those who are in need.  And so, I share this as a way of being thankful that God has given me a quick and tangible answer to my statement about understanding grace more.  I don’t know that I’ll be so eager to interact with that colleague that I mentioned, just because change takes time.  But I hope that God broadens my heart to love her, just because I am just like her.